the angel of midnight
by Paige sunshine neeley
Summary: One sothern belle is dissapointed when she finds out that she has to leave her town, her home, and her family to go live with her much dispised cousin...Bella! But, can an unsuspected love convince her to stay!
1. The kiss of death

I was surprised. I had always thought that death, would scare me. But now, here i was staring death in the face and the only emotion that i was capable of passing on was unsurpassed happiness. I knew that even if i did'nt live, he would! I knew he was one hundred miles away, and that once they were through with me, he would be safe! I thought and thought about what an idiot i was being...how stupid and worthless it was to die for a boy that would never love someone as horrifyingly plain as you the way you love him! But no matter how many times i said it to myself i could never bring myself to believe it. He was the first and last person i would ever truly love. Suddenly, i was filled with unconntrollable pain. I fell to the ground with a hard and dramatic thunk! And then i knew it would soon be over. I could here those poetic words in my head "better to have loved and lost, than to have never have loved at all!" These words were true! Even though i was about to die for him i would still be better off than if i had never loved him at all. Then as i was slowly losing consciousness, i saw it...the face of an angel! then i forced the words out of my mouth before he could even speak, dont worry jasper...I love you too!"


	2. the trip to HELL!

I watched the sunset fade out of view as i left my hometown of hickory. It was strange how i had always wanted to leave hickory and go somewhere strange and exciting. Now my wish ws being granted i wanted nothing more than to stay rooted down in the blue collar town. I suppose that most of my resentment for the town of forks came from the fact that i would be staying with my cousin Bella and her,well, _**strange**_ new family. She talked about the cullens like they were saints, and according to her edward cullens her new husband was the center of the world, but when i asked her questions like how old they were and where they came from she would act offended like i had asked the most personal questions in the world. It made me so angry that Bella, on top of everything else shes done to me, would try and make me the enemy!

I sat on the plane for hours with nothing to do but think. So, i did. I just thought, and thought, and thought. But, mostly, i thought about bella. I used to love bella like my own big sister before she moved to forks, but when she moved she started to change.When we were kids we used to look exactly alike, not even our parents could tell us apart! But then she grew up. Slowly she lost the freckles that used to be splatered across her face, revealing beautiful porcilean skin. Her hair started to thicken and grow to be the most gorgeous shade of ebony black, but i had made none of those changes. I looked exactly as i had all those years ago. My face still had every frecklefrom my adolescenes, and a few added on since then! My hair was still as red as a carrot, and my body was as boring as it ever was and more than likely ever would be. I was no more to bella than an embarrasing cousin geek of a cousin that now was coming to take up more space in her home! And, as for as i was concerned, that was all she would be to me!

Suddenly, i heard a large wistling sound in my ear, then i realized what it was...I was finally there!


	3. cruel words, and empty faces

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At first things were'nt so bad.

The grass was still green, the sky was still blue, and the people seemed friendly enough.

But, looks can be descieving! In a flash--as in before i had time to turn around--there was Bella, smiling like she wanted me there. In fact, if i had'nt kown any better, i would have thought the smile was sincere!

"Natalie!" She screeched with exatgerated excitment, if any at all! "It's been so long! How are you!?" She was talking at a million words a minuete! I started to wonder if she even understood half the things that were coming out of her mouth! Then, out of absolutely no were, she consumed me in a warm embrace! "What are you doing!?" I yelled out the words without even thinking about them! She may have been my cousin, but i did NOT think of her as family! as far as i was concerned she was the enemy...and there was going to be WAR! "I'm giving you a hug Nat...It's me Bella, remember?" She asked, looking truly hurt. I thought about why she was acting so...friendly. Then, like he was reading my mind, there was her new husband...EDWARD!

"Speak of the devil," I mumbled under my breath, "And the devil shall apear!". I knew that they could'nt have heard me, because i was'nt even talking loud even for what i said to be a whisper! But as soon as i said it there faces sunk like they had been truly hurt. I did not care.

The ride from the airport had been a dull, beacause i was half asleep the whole time, yet it seemed to take a long time. I suppose it was because i was looking forward to meeting this new family of Bella's. In my mind, i thought that the sooner i meet them the sooneer i can insult them. But, thats not what happened.

When we first got there, the first thing i saw was a boy--who seemed to be about my age--coming to meet us at the car. When i first looked at him i noticed one thing...He had the most unmistakandly beautiful face that i had ever seen. It took all i had to convince myself that i was'nt dreaming. He came over to my car door in one quick, graceful movement. With Bella theis grace had annoyed me, but with him it just took my breath away! He opened my door (i think my heart stopped!) And with one mighty swipe he picked me up in his arms with the kind of grace that would take any talented ballerina's breath away...It sure as hek took away mine! Then, he looked at me for what seemed to be eternity, and smiled a coy and romantic smile. "My name is Jasper" he said to break the silence "And this is our home" He pointed to a large white manshion that belonged in a romance movie, instead of my life! For once i thought "I think i'm going to like it here!".


	4. An akward intruduction

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The white house was eveen more gorgous, and big on the inside

than it was on the outside!

There was a rather large couch placed neatly in the corner of what appeared to be the living room

There was a gigantic area rug that seemed to devour the front foyer with streaming oriental red, and beautiful

magnolia flowers pouring over in a lovely fashion.

But, it wasn't the rug that caught my attenion, it was the

beautiful woman standing on it to greet me that first caught my eye.

I was awestruck with how absolutely stunning she was! Her hair was the perfect shade of ebony black.

Her eyes were abousolutely breath taking...The shade of blue that was only ment to be used on the sky.

And, the thing that made her the most beautiful of them all was the natural shade of her lips...The shade of red that

Could never be put in a lipstick bottle!

Just as i was off in lala land admiring this uncomparable creature, five more of the beautiful beings

came to join the woman on her place on the gorgous foyer rug!

"You must be Natalie!" One of the younger girls nearly screeched to top of her lungs, "Oh my god! I can't believe it

Bella has told me so much about you! I feal like I know you! In fact," She paused from her confused babling and reached

over to scoop me up in a motherly embrace (Which was starting to become an unwanted habit), "Welcome home...sister!".

I was dazed, I had never had perfect strangers come in and treat me like thier own. So, I responded in the only

way I could, "Um, thank you, um Mrs., uh..." , "Alice, Alice Cullen, at your service" I liked the sound of that!

I looked into the eyes of each of thier expecting faces. I knew they were waiting for me to speak...I just did'nt

know what to say! I felt bad looking into Bella's sad needy eyes', and, for one tiny second, I almost cared.

Finally, the akward silence was broken by the velvety voice of my first friend in forks...Jasper. "Well,"

He said while scanning the room with his wide and overly visualant eyes', "I'm sure that Natalie has had a long

and eventfull day, and would like to get to bed would'nt you say?"

Ofcourse, Alice was quick to answer. "But she just got here!" Alice screamed in unneeded fury

"Can't we at least give her a tour of the town!" Alice's eyes' were wide and full of hope, but I knew she had

already lost...and so did she! "Now Alice," Said Jasper in the most persuasive voice that could have ever been

uttered, "Natalie has had a long day, and she needs her rest, besides we have all summer to show her the town

anyway."

Alice did not retaliat like I had thought she would have. Instead she took a step back in order to give

Jasper spotlight, which he imediatley stole with a seductive smile!

"Come," He said in an overly calm voice, and then once again he swept me off my feet and into his

arms all over again. Normally I would have fought back and tried to stand up for myself, but i was lost in the

cool feel of his skin.

In a heartbeat, and with no visible strain, Japer carried me up the stairs and into a beautifly adorned

guest room filled with glorious amounts of flowers and homecoming gifts.

In the middle of the room there was a large bed that seemed to cry out to me. I then realized why,

I was tired. But, I had been so caught up in the days events that I had'nt even noticed...But Jasper had!

Very gentley, he laid on the bed and tucked me in. For the first time I noticed the way Jasper

carried me. It was like he was carrying a fine piece of china, like I was frigiale and breakable. But,

I didn't mind, in fact, I kind of liked it. It made me feel...special.

Then, he started to walk away, and for once, he took his time. It was like he did'nt want to

leave...or more like i did'nt want him to leave!

I mumbled one more thing before he left, " I KNOW I'm going to like it here!". He was already

in the hall by now and I knew he could'nt hear me, NO HUMAN COULD! But, still I heard him laugh.

His laugh was soothing and gentle. Infact the more i thought about it Jasper's laugh was

more like a lullabye, than like a laugh! But, I didn't have time to think about it, because before long

I was drifting into the arms of sweet, serene sleep!


	5. NEVER AGAIN

_**Natalie's Dream:**_

_**"The house was dark and empty,**_

_**there was no one to be found no matter where I looked.**_

_**The rooms' of the once thoroughly decorated house were **_

_**now empty, and totally vacant.**_

_**I should have been surprised...Infact I should have been terrified!**_

_**But, I wasn't. **_

_**I had never expected anything more from this place **_

_**but emptiness, and depresion.**_

_**So, just as was expected of me, I fell to my knees'**_

_**and the the river of tears I had been holding back for years stream down**_

_**my lonely face.**_

_**Now I was as empty as the house itself, I would always be alone.**_

_**But, then a light flicked on and I realized that I was not alone...**_

_**Because standing there and holding me in his arms, was Jasper!**_

_**"Oh, Jasper, your here!" I wanted to schreech out to him,**_

_**But before I could, He stoped me.**_

_**"Shhhh..." He comforted me,**_

_**"Don't worry, you will NEVER be alone again"**_

_**And this time I knew it was the truth.**_

The dream had lasted all night but seemed to only last a second...

a very SHORT second!

Because he next thing I knew, I was out of Jaspers arms and into Bella's husband

Edward's, who was taking me downstairs to eat breakfast.

This I could not take sitting down! "PUT ME DOWN!!"

I screeched as soon as I regained my consciousness.

But, it was to late I was already in a chair, at the breakfast table, with a large plate filled with pancakes

in front of my restless face. These guys were really fast! But I didn't let edwards speed let him get away with

doing something nice for me. He was NOT ALLOWED!

I turned my head to face him, my eyes' filled with filled with raw rage!

"NEVER, EVER TOUCH ME AGAIN!!"

My scream had caught the attention of those in the kitchen, but it just made

Edward laugh as he went up the stairs in one quick movement.

"GRRRR..." I was furious, but I knew there was nothing I could do,

because everyone watching was on his side...including bella!

So I, as usual, just went ahead and did what they wanted me to.

I turned my head to face the steaming pile on the plate in front of me and dug in.

I was quick with eating the pancakes, so I went back to examining the faces

of the unusual faces' in the kitchen.

The first one I noticed was, ofcourse, was the woman I first saw the day I came

to this place. I now knew her name was Esme. And, though I would never admit it out loud

I thought that was the most beautiful name in the world...It was a name she deserved.

Then, I moved my attention to Alice who was washing a sink of dishes.

I thought it was funny how she was so quick to befriend me. She was

the kind of girl that makes all the others jealous because she was so pretty!

I was almost positive that me and Alice were going to be friends for a long time.

Standing next to Alice, drying dishes, was the girl they called Rose.

I hadn't even said anything to Rose and yet she already seemed to hate me.

From the moment I walked through the door of that white house she gave me an evil scowl that

could have killed anyone in reach! Suddenly she realized that I was staring at me and began

to at me.

I was no fool. As quick as I possibly could I shifted my eyes to Carlisle, who was

staring at Esme with a smile that obviously meant love. I noticed right away the Handsome

features that Carlisle possesed. His hair was a gorgous shade of gold with the brown hair here

and there clearly marking him a striking brunette. The masculine line of his jaw which broke off and

curved into a gloriously manly chin. There was no doubt, Carlisle was a hearthrob...Just like Edward,

but this I would NEVER ADMIT!

Finally, there was my traitor of a cousin...Bella. There was no mistaking that Bella was beautiful,

as were all the others, but still she would never be beutiful enough to make up for ruining my life, and

becoming someone she obviosly was not! This was unforgivable in my eyes!

For a moment I studied the group. I soon noticed that they all belonged together. They were

all like a pack of beautiful swans...And I was just the ugly duck. I could never be a member of this family.

This made me wonder one thing...Why did they want me?!

The more I looked at the strange group of beautiful people, the more something seemed wrong.

Then, I knew what it was..."Where's Jasper?" I said with panick in my voice. Before any of the thier lovely

faces could answer, there was Jasper, right in front of me. It happened so fast that for a moment I thought

that maybe he had been standing there the whole time.

"Can I help you?" He said with a devastating smile. "Uh..." I had to think of something...Fast! "Um, I was

wondering if you and Alice would show me around town." Alice's eyes' lit up! What was I thinking!

Jasper seemed to read my expression and gave a rhythmic laugh.

So, that was it I was going to tour this horride town thanks to my big mouth! Only one thing made it

worth it...Jasper said he would come too!


	6. the first kiss

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That Friday had been a blur to me for most of the afternoon.

It mostly consist of Alice going on about this place and that place,

and who those people where and who these people are,

so it quickly became very boring for me.

Jasper seemed to horribly amused by Alice's enthusiasm,

and even more so, my boredom!

I mostly stared out the window for the entire ordeal.

Ocassionally Alice would ask me an undescernable question,

and I would quickly stagger back to reallity.

But that was pretty much the extent of the trip.

I Knew that we must have stayed out combing the streets of the

small town for the whole of five hours!

Yet within an instant we were back in front of the big white house,

and the ordeal was thoroughly over.

I hobbled out of the expensive looking yellow porsche grudgingly.

"Why did Alice have to take _this_ car out for the tour?" I asked myself with an iner sigh.

But, then I realized how childish I was being!

Most seventeen year olds would have _**killed**_ to ride in a car like this!

And here I had spent the whole time moping around like a ghost!

I automatically regretted my unenthusiastic behavior,

espicially after seeing Alice's ecstatic expression.

"Wow, wasn't that fun! We _have_ to do that again sometime! Did you have fun Natalie?!"

I had to lie. "Um, yeah that was just, uh, great...We should really do that again somtime."

Had I gone crazy!!

Alice's small face instantly lit up with to much enthusiasm...AGAIN!

She really seemed to have a nack for being happy.

she should really teach me how.

Thankfully Jasper grabed her hand and pulled her into a large embrace.

Alice and Jasper seemed to be very close, and I didn't understand why.

"C'mon" Jasper said in a warm tone in my direction "Esme has ordered pizza...For your enjoyment, ofcourse."

His articulation was flawless, as was the articulation of all the cullens (excluding Bella ofcourse!).

I found this a very attractive feature of Jasper's, something romantic and coy in my opinion.

It had an unusual affect on me. Suddenly, before I could stop my sly feet, I was walking in Jaspers direction, _getting closer and closer._

Alice had already gone inside, _Closer and closer._

He kept his feet planted firmly on the ground, _closer and closer._

I watched as the sides of his pale lips curved up into a beautiful smile, _closer and closer._

And then my face was close enough to his that if he moved down one half of an inch, he could _kiss_ me.

And thats exactly what he did.

Suddenlly we were locked in an overly passionate kiss.

My hand locked in his hair and his in mine.

By the time we finished I was gasping for air.

Then I saw his face, relaxed and calm, staring back lovingly at me.

"We should go," He said softly "They'll wonder where we are."

That was all.

It had been our first kiss, but I knew it would'nt be our last!


	7. False Comfort

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The sun came pouring over the edges of the bedroom blinds...

But I was only partially aware of this fact.

I was mostly lost in the twist and turns of my subconscious mind.

I was totally lost in my own world trying to make sense of what had

happened on friday.

One part of me KNEW for a fact that it had happened...

But another part of me was not so c

But another part of me wasconvonced.

I kept going over the days evnts in my head.

The car ride, his soft voice...our _kiss!_

But , still, none of it made sense!

I was Just another ordinary girl.

There was nothing special about my face.

It wasn't ugly...It just wasn't _great._

I looed at my face in the mirror wh discerning my nothing special features.

I had a small nose, medium sized lips', and greenish eyes, Nothing

spiecial...Nothing _**BEAUTIFUL!!**_

There had to be something to my plain face that he found

attractive...But I found nothing!

Nothing but a boring face, on a boring person.

Then, without even having time to think, there was Edward, standing

at my side, glowering at my discontentment...As if he had read my

mind. But, this was impossible.

"What do you want?!" I coughed up in a hoarse voice.

Then, I realized, I was crying.

"I came to tell you that breakfast was ready, but I see I've disturbed

you." He seemed uncomforterable with the situation, He obviously

didn't have much experiance on the subject.

For a moment I thought he had left, but instead he was right there

beside me with his arm stretched over my shoulder,

I was quick to shrug it off.

"Get away from me," I said in a voice that I didn't recognize, "Leave

me ALONE!" But instead of listening to me he just pulled me closer

to his hard chest.

"You're _so much_ like your cousin," He said this like he said it

everyday...And I didn't like that idea, one BIT!

"I am nothing like her, you hear me, _**NOTHING!**_"

My anger was outragous, even for me!

But, instead of acting offended he simply laughed it off and pulled

me even closer to his cold stone-like chest.

This time though I found it comforting.

I really needed someone to hug, though this was one of the many

things that I would never say out loud, but Edward always seemed to

know, it was getting pretty creepy.

Though I would have preffered for Jasper to be the one to save me

from my terrible stuppor, I still felt relief.

And, for a short moment, all was quiet...All was peaceful.

Then, the silence was broken by Edward's soft, comforting voice,

"Your very fond of Jasper, aren't you?"

"Yes," I admitted, there was no use in hiding it now.

Then it was silent for another short second before Edward spoke

again, "Bella, theres something that you should know about Jasper,"

His voice was weary, and I was worried...

"It's about him and Alice, you see there..._**MARRIED!**_

At that very moment, My heart stopped.


	8. The awakining

Suddenly, all was dark.

It took me a while to realize why, though.

But, I figured it out.

I had obviously passed out.

"Oh well," I thought to my unconscious self,

"Typical me."

Then light consumed the darkness, and I soon realized where I was...

JASPERS ROOM!!

The first emotion that I wanted to convey was anger, that was what my insticts pleaded

for, and it was obviously the right choice!

But, as soon as I saw his concerned face staring at me with worry,

the only thing I was capable of expressing was my uncontrolable love for him...

How stupid.

"How are you feeling?" Said a soft voice that didn't belong to Jasper,

I soon recognized the voice to be that of Carlisle,

and then I realized...We were not alone.

The rather large room was filled to it's maximum capacity...And I was only taking up more room.

Then my eye's locked in with those of Alice, and soon became filled with emotion.

Her eye's were sharp and obiously angry, but the dominant emotion held there was definitly pain.

I could'nt stand to see the once ecstatic, and vivacious teenager in such grievious pain.

I snaped my head away to look at bella's expression.

It was annoying because she tried to reasure me that everything was okay with her eye's.

"It's going to be okay," she seemed to speak to me, "Everything is going to be fine!".

These were both lies. Because everything was _not okay!_

I then seemed to notice Edward, who had my hand in his, trying to be reasuring.

It didn't work.

"Natalie," Carlisle pressed, "It's us, how are you feeling?"

_like I've been hit by a truck,_ I wanted to scream.

But, I didn't want to worry them .

"I'm fine," I lied, they were not convinced.

Jasper took my free hand, Alice lost all the sadness in her face--Transforming it into pure fury.

I wanted to pull my hand away just to make Alice happy,

But I couldn't let go.

I was afriad that I was just dreaming and that the moment I let go of him...He would fly away.

But, I was not dreaming.

The room was now filled with whispering that was so fast and so low that it was impossible for

my unacute senses to descern.

Which was annoying, because I _knew_ they were talking about _me_!

Alice looked at Bella, obviously engaged in some form of low conversation,

And then snapped her head in my direction, and held her glance there without fail.

I wanted to tell her how sorry I was.

I wanted to get on my knee's just to show her how much I wanted to be her friend.

But, Edward didn't give me the chance.

"_Natalie?_" Edward asked, apparantly worried,

"_I didn't upset you did I?"_

_Yes, you did!_ I wanted to yell at him,

But, i did not...Because he was only trying to help.

"No, Edward, it wasn't you." I said sincerely.

I tried to jerk an angry look in Jaspers direction,

But it only made him smile.

Then I realized why, I was smiling back.

I could not help it.

"Don't worry, she's going to be fine," Carlisle whispered silently into

Jaspers ear. These words seemed to be enough.

Slowly Jasper pried his hands from mine, My hand felt broken.

Quietly the number of those in the room went down, until the total occupancey was two...

Me...And Alice.

As soon as I realized who the other being in the room was, I panicked!

I wanted to run, to scream, to join the others who had already made thier grand exit...

But it was to late.

Alice was already joining my side at the bed, her face filled with uncontrolable _**RAGE!!**_

"Natalie," She pressed, her voice as angry as her eye's, "Can I have a word with you?"

I gulped loudly...This could _not_ be good!!


	9. A broken heart is sealed

I looked into Alice face.

Any blind person could have noticed that she was furious!

Her face was twisted into an impossible position,

which obviously took alot of work because a low growl was coming from the pit of her chest

from the effort she was putting out.

There was a moment in that room, that seemed to take forever, when Alice and I simply stared

at each other.

I could tell that she was reading my features just as intensely as I was hers.

She seemed to be predicting my next move, like a lion on prey.

Now, I was scared.

I suddenly felt all the color leave my face as she moved closer to me.

It was impossible to tell what she was going to do next,

because anger dominated her features.

Then, she did something I never would have expected in a million years.

She did something so breath taking that it would have knocked the breath out of me if

I didn't now why she was doing it.

She sat on the bed..._Huged me..._And then, burst into tears!

I could not help myself.

I put my arms around her, huged her back, and then started to cry with her.

After what seemed to be eternity she released me from her forceful grasp and looked into

_d_

my eyes.

"Natalie," She said throught tear driven eyes, "You love him don't you?"

How could I answer.

The truth was obvious.

"Yes," I said, there was nothing more to say.

The tears came back to her, only twice as bad.

She leaned in again and huged me.

Siting there looking at the pain I knew I had caused, I felt my stone

cold and indignant heart burst into small fragments of the original.

I was such a monster.

Here was someone who from the beginning of my indiffrent arrival

had wanted nothing more than to be my friend,

and how did I repay her?

By kissing her one true love.

There was no words for the pain I had caused.

I didn't _deserve_ to have Alice as a friend.

I didn't even deserve to live.

Just as I was about to beg Alice to forgive me,

to get on my knee's and grovel until I sweat blood!

Alice said something that _no one_ could have expected...

"I'm happy for both of you."

"No your not Alice...And I personally don't blame you.

You have the rights to kill me if you want, I would actually like that!!"

"You know thats not true Natalie," her tone was solemn, "You love him...

More than I do."

I knew that this could'nt be true, but a small piece of me kept saying it was.

I wanted that piece of me to shut up!

I stared with tears streaming down my face at the girl whose heart I had shatered.

And my heart shatered as well.

Today was not a good day.

"Natalie," Said Alice, pausing between tears,

"I want Jasper to be happy, and it's obvious that will never

happen until he has you..." Her voice trailed of at the words and her sobbing increased...

So did mine.

Then, after hours of sobs and broken hearts and tears...She smiled.

Not just any smile, a sincere smile that showed love and happiness.

I realized in that moment how much I loved Alice...I was so stupid!!

She bent her face close to mine, and softly and gently kissed my cheek.

"Take care of him for me..." She whispered softly in my ear.

Then...she was gone.

I never saw her again.


	10. In an angels presence

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When Alice left,

she had been very thorough.

The corner of her room which once held a petite pink chair

was now consumed with a large full sized bed,

which just so happened to be ardorned with sheets' that were my favorite color...

Perywinkle blue...Alice had hated perywinkle blue.

Her windows that had once been draped with frilly pink curtains were now left bare and open.

But, the most shocking part of the rooms transformation was by far the closet.

The large space which had once been filled with hundreds of gorgous ensombles

now contained nothing but five scrawny articles of clothing...Which belonged to me.

It was obvious who the room now belonged to,

but the very idea made me sick.

They expected me to stay in the room which once belonged to someone whose heart I broke?!

I could not bear the thought.

I quickly snatched the unworthy pieces of fabric, and raced down the hall to the guest bedroom.

I put the pieces in thier origional spaces, fell to the floor, and cried.

Before long Jasper had me in his arm trying to placate me...Without much success.

"Shhhh...Shhh..." He wispered with a baby soft voice into my ear, "I know, I know, I Loved Her TOO!"

"No you did'nt!!" I screamed out at him, but then I realized how hoarse his perfect voice was.

Then I realized, he was crying too.

I was not the only one who was suffering...The only one who had lost someone she loved.

Then as quickly wraped my small arms around Jasper's large body, and sat there in his presence.

Suddenly, I was calm.

I was not sure why, but I knew it had something to do with Jasper's presence.

Then I realized how beautiful this moment was.

We were two lovers, in each others arms, trying to comfort one another.

NOTHING, could have made me happier.


	11. The forever times

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For months after Alice left,

the seconds of my life seemed to move in slow motion.

Days felt like years, and weeks were eternity as far as I was concerned!

But now, looking back on it,

I wish those days could have lasted longer.

I wish that I could have lived every second that I had with Jasper for the rest of my life.

I wish that the memories of summer picnics,

and days by the lake,

and the nights Jasper and I spent counting the stars under a full moon,

could be more than just good Memories,

But...They are not.

I can no longer spend inocent evenings with jasper in fields of flowers,

or under stars, or by quiet streams...

Those days have long since past us over.

Jasper and I had done everything to make

our summer one that would last us

forever and all eternity...

but time did not return us the favor.

It seemed to happen so quickly...

One mornings I opened my eyes...

And summer was gone.

It was time to go home.


	12. The question

_**REVIEW THIS PLEASE!!**_

By some miracle of God,

Carlisle had convinced my histarical mother

to allow me three more days in Forks.

Which as far as I was concered was just the same as three

more seconds.

There were so many things left

unsaid, people I had yet to say goodbye to,

Not to mention, the prospect of leaving Jasper.

Believe it or not I had accumulated a large number of friends here in

the solemn town of forks.

There was Angela (Who would always listen to my lengthy stories of

my hometown and she even managed to act interested, but I knew this

was impossible.), then there was ben,

and Jessica,

and Eric (who had become a little

overly affectionate torwards me,

but Jasper made sure he knew his

boundries!),

and then there was my personal best friend

Mike Newton!

When I first met Mike Newton I was ecstatic to know

that there was someone in the boring town of Forks

who shared my same enthusiam in sports,

and he felt the same!

But now this was all gone.

All my plans,

all of the life I had made,

and all those who I had become close to were

nowbeing pulled away...

I could hardly bear the thought!

If it were not for Jasper I would not have survived.

Jasper was helping me pack.

Well, I suppose watching me pack would

be more accurate.

He was just of in the corner,

but he might as well been on a diffrent planet.

His eyes were locked on me,

but he was'nt looking at me...

He was looking _through_ me.

He seemed to be examining my very soul

as if there was the answer to an important question there.

Apparantly, he found it.

Because for the first time in hours he began to move...

Torwards me!

For a long moment he seemed to hover over me protectively.

As if there was someone else in the room.

Then he gentley brushed his hand across my cheek

and broke the ear piercing silence in two

with his velvety soft voice,

"Natalie, theres somthing I need to ask you,"

"Yes," I encouraged, my couriousity peaked.

"Well, I" He paused, got on one knee, and

took my hand.

"Natalie Elizibeth Richards,"

"Yes," I said totally oblivious

to what was going on.

He puffed up his chest, and choked out the words with

difficulty, "Will you marry me?".

I do not know what he said next,

because the next thing I knew I was on the floor...

All was black...

All was bleak.


	13. The Answer

PLEASE REVIEW!!

When I awoke I was Lying on the bed of the guest

bedroom, Jaspers hands still on mine,

looking at me with a face full of worry.

He was concerned,

but it was obvious what he was waiting for.

"Well," He managed to gulp out.

Marriage was another thing that set

Bella and I on two seperate planets.

I loved the idea of marriage.

Thoughts of young love, and a husband,

and children had always haunted my greatest dreams.

And, yet, here was someone who I loved desperately,

and who loved me too, giveing me the oppertunity of a lifetime...

And I could not accept it.

"No," I finally managed to utter while choking back tears.

"Why?!" He said, obviously dissapointed.

I could never tell Jasper the real reason.

The only person I could ever see Jasper marrying was Alice.

She was the only one good enough for him...

The only on who deserved him in all his perfect glory.

I could not even compare!

So, I had to lie.

"Well," Isaid trying to think fast,

"I'm, uh, not ready."

This lie went beyond untrue!

The moment I laid eyes on Jasper I was ready to marry him.

He could see clearly through my lie.

So, instead of using force to sway my moral judgement...

he used persuasion!

Slowly he sat down on the bed beside me.

He lifted up his hand and started tracing the lines of my

face, my arm, my neck...My body!!

Then, without warning, he bent down and we engaged in a passionate kiss.

This was a little too enjoyable.

Slowly I contoured my lips with his,

my hands went crazy feeling every part of his strong, hard, musclear body.

Things were happening quickly!

Before I knew it he was on top of me,

but I did not object!

Suddenly my shirt was off,

and so was his.

I could feel the cold of his stone hard chest...


	14. OH NO

PLEASE REVIEW!!

I awoke on the ever framiliar bed,

with thoughts of sweet serenity floating in my head.

It had been so perfect.

There was jasper...

there was me...

there was love.

The morning was meeting me with a bracing cold,

and currently, the only protection my bare flesh had

was the thin sheet on the comfortable bed.

so many things had happened so quickly.

There were a million questions that I could have asked

but there was only one that I could think of...

were was jasper!

As alway he was there in a flash...with an unusualy devilish smile

swiped across his beautiful face.

I felt so ashamed of myself...

I had no right to be in the presence of such a being.

I was uncomprihendably plain in his shadow.

I soon realized that he was looking at my hand...

My left hand!

Now even more questions were there!

.

Why was he looking at my hand...

why was he smiling like that...

why was my hand suddenly so heavy?

Slowly, I dared to look at my hand.

And there was a beautiful ring full of diamonds and saphires.

what had I done!!

Then it came back to me.

sometime while I was lost within this strange world which was a mixture love, and lust

I had answered Jasper's qeustion with a diffrent answer.

"Yes!!" I had screeched at an unnecissary volume.

That was the cause behind Jasper's beautiful smile.

Yes, I was going to marry the love of my life...

wether I liked it or not.


	15. my VERY! big day

i felt the soft, white satin slide through my

fingers as esme eased the crisp new gloves on my

hands.

They were perfect...soft, and pure white.

Exactley like my dress.

my wedding dress.

"how beautiful," said bella,

her beautiful face full of uncontainable

excitement...I eased my face around

searching for a mirror.

"NO, not yet dear..." I twirled around to see

jasper.

MY jasper.

Standing there, basking (rightfully)

in his own uncomparable glory, and beauty.

He looked espeicially masculine and angelic

in his new ebony, black tuxedo.

His shaggy long, golden hair was parted

and slicked back with expensive hair gel.

His eyes were looking back into mine with a mocking,

laughing glen in them.

He carried in a small, flat, velvet covered box in his hands.

I smiled right back and mirrored his mocking expression.

"Don't you know, that its bad luck to see the bride before the wedding..."

he stoped me, "yes," his smile grew..."but you are no ordinary bride...remember?"

he wraped his strong arms around me gently. "you are MY bride...and

i could not resist one more moment..." he released me, and i had wished he hadnt.

i wanted him to pull me back into his strong chest...

and hold me there forever.

"ive brought you something..." he held up the box in front of my face,

just inches from my eyes...

i reached out to touch and he pulled it out from my reach.

"HEY, no fair!" he chuckled, then slowly and carefully inched

out the contents of the little black box.

From it came the most beautiful piece if jewerly ever in existance.

It was a saphire, and diamond necklace. It was like an

oversized explosion of blue and...every other color imaginable

as he held it to the light.

I stood staring in dumbfoundment at the pure glory of the object in front of me.

I was unable to move...my legs were like stone.

I could here the people and things around me but i

couldnt move or speak or react.

"Shes stuned!!!" yelled esme softly in her motherly voice.

"oh no," said bella "we'll never get her out like this!"

I simply heard jasper smile as he kissed my forehead and passed me through the door.

They were all right, i had a wedding to get to...

MY wedding for heavans sake! so i snaped out of it, (somehow)

and forced myself down the beautiful, marble stairs.

I was meet by a million smiling faces staring at me.

i took a step forward and nearly fell over...(my neck was heavy)

a million things running through my brain, and i could fell the tears coming on.

I looked ahead of me to see jasper standing, straight and proud at the beautifully

adorned alter. "nothing could ruin this for me..." i thought to myself.

Just then...a voice screamed loudly "STOP!!!" and I felt something heavy hit my back hard.

I was confused, and disorientaded...but mostly i was angry!

who would dare come in and ruin MY special day!!!

so...i screamed. as loud as i could.

"WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE!!!??"

i turned around to face my biggest fear...a very angry, very confused...alice.

i went cold...

everything went quiet...

she smiled.


	16. then i knew

i sat there...

umovable, unchanging, unable to speak...

a statue of stone...

and as she stared at me,

with those big, accusing honey drop eyes,

i started to cry.

she was icy and unfeeling as i burst into tears.

i was gasping for air,

looking for the words to say.

but she didn't want to hear any of it.

she had come for a reason...

i just wished that she would tell us,

what it was.

before i totally lost it.

she smiled again.

but, this time...

it was a real smile.

it was a warm, calming...

a friendly smile.

jasper sat in the corner.

unable to understand his own feelings,

let alone anyone elses...

i watched as he looked between me and her,

as he shifted uncomfortably i could see true conflict

in his eyes.

no one said anything...

there were no words of warm greeting,

or even words of harsh accusement.

just silent looks and uncomfortable faces.

_swoosh..._i felt something fly past me.

it was edward embracing alice in a warm hug.

"were have you been!!!" he screamed at her,

angry at her disaperence, and happy at her safe return.

i had grown to love edward.

he was strong and gentle.

like a big brother.

but he loved her more,

and i knew that...

i always knew that.

"theres no time to explain,

but jasper you and natalie can NOT

get married!!!"

jasper slamed his fist down

hard on the expensive cherry table at his side...

"WHY NOT!?!!" i saw anger and pain shoot

across his beautiful face.

he didnt know what was right to do...

but he knew what he wanted...

alice barley even flinched.

her expression, was exactly the same.

"because," she smiled camly...

"natalie has gotten herself into a bit of trouble

with some old friends..."

all went quiet again...

and i was so confused.

what did they mean i had

gotten myself into trouble,

and who were these old friends.

"what do you mean? what old friends..."

alice looked at jasper, and her smile widened.

she looked at me and tilted her head as she twisted her hair around her fingers...

"tell me natalie," she said, half laughing.

"have you ever heard of the volturi..."


	17. choice

so, yeah. they were vampires. crazy right? oh, and thats not even the worst part. it gets better. theyre also vampires that have manage to piss off what is, and im paraphrasing, the biggest most fucking important vampires in all of the wierdo mystical community. why hadnt he told me? i mean, sure, its not first date material, but...what about all those days in the sun? those picnics, those nights in his arms. the romance of the moment was gone...the poetics, were over with. i didnt care about that much anymore...to think, all the little things that had seemed so important just moments ago. now, they didnt mean anything..they didnt mean anything at all. i had to save my life, i had to save my loves...i had to change everything. i thought for a moment that i would pass out. i expected that after all this excitement, that all would go black. but, then i realized..i wasnt going out. i was standing. straight up. no slouching, arms crossed...i caught a glance of myself in a mirror. i looked powerful. like the old me was some wierd shadow. some awkward figure following me around. i think i finally realized that i couldnt be that girl. i had to be this..this powerful women. consise and sure, and ready to do what was neccessary. i turned to alice, a strange look of melancholy accross her face...i asked "what are my options..." the look dropped, and she sat up straight. and told me, clear and simple...

"Become a vampire...

or die..."

...i always like ultimatums.


End file.
